Forehead Fungus. Of course.

Picked up a prescription cream for Pigpen’s latest malady today: Forehead Fungus.

Me: Hi! I’m here to pick up a prescription?

Cashier: [squinting at label] Ummmm…okay. Hang on.

Pharmacist: [appears at drive thru window, leaning out]: Um, hi. Do you have any questions about this….medication?

He whispered this last line, glancing around lest someone overheard him.


Pharmacist: Do you know how to apply it?

Me: Uhhh….I just rub it on his forehead, right?

This is all very shady. I’m wondering about the caliber of fungus that Pigpen has acquired.

Pharmacist: Oh, this isn’t for you?

Me: No. For my three year old. Fungus on the head. [gesture at Pigpen and his fungus]

Pharmacist: Oh. [looks at label again] Interesting. Okay, then. Have a good day!

Me: [baffled]

As I drove off, I glanced at the label. At the huge black letters: VAGINAL ANTI-FUNGAL

Ohhhhhh…..Awkward.