Friday, April 01, 2011

Ahoy there!

Well, it turns out that reaching 1000 posts isn't good for my health. (Thought it was lovely to hear from all of you. I liked the creepers the most.) Just about the time I achieved that milestone, I contracted the dreaded stomach flu from my main disease carrier, Pigpen.

Based on past experience, I can't have a stomach bug with normal 12-24 hour expected results. No, no. I have to get all dehydrated and lose feeling in my extremeties and not be able to keep anything in my system and puke until my body is juicing my organs and I wind up in the ER on an IV kind of sick. It really does keep things lively, I tell you.

Sooooo, that's where I've been. Eating toast, bagels, plain noodles, and crackers since Monday. I'm about to try my first real meal and I'm hungry, but nervous. Pigpen, by the way, had this virus for about three hours in a small way. Piglet had a stomach ache. Mr. Pigs had a fairly hearty 6 hours of it, but no puking. Me? Shudder.

In other health news, I learned last week that my left eye is ripe for cataract surgery! I kind of can't wait. I get to actually have the vision in that eye corrected. Did you hear that? I won't need glasses! Okay, well, in that eye anyway. Ooh! Do you think I'd look good with a monocle?

I'm here to tell you that there are not nearly enough pictures on the Internet of pigs wearing monocles.

The downside of the cataract (aside from the fact that I am 34 years old and have cataracts, if that's not obvious) is that it has really slowed up my reading. My entire left eye is useless. It's like looking through a cloud. I can see things that move, can't really identify them, aaaaaand that's about it. No faces, no words, no type. So my right eye deserves a vacation. Maybe when I get my senior status pair of cataract sunglasses, I'll take it somewhere tropical.

I'm here to tell you that there are not any pictures of a pig wearing cataract sunglasses in a tropical locale on the Internet. I have to stop playing around on Swagbucks. Oh, hey! Shameless plug, since some folks seem to have forgotten the joys that are Swagbucks, I'm up to 41 gift cards now. That's 41 times $5 of free Amazon money, which is, ummmm....$205? Ish? In about a year of searching? Have you joined? Then use it. If you haven't joined, then join here and get 30 free Swagbucks. You didn't know you were going to read right into a commercial, did you? Surprise! But really, do it. It's free money.

My left eye is tired of being squeezed shut, so I'm going to sign off. Wink, wink. (Do you think I'll look like a pirate?)


AMPlifier said...

Let me know if your eye would like another pair to keep it company on that tropical vacation.  Glad you're feeling better ~ I had no idea it was that bad!  >:o

Nonni said...

My goodness!  You're poor eye!  So good that they can do something about cataracts these days.  I am one of the "creepers."  I left a comment today on your 1000th post.  I enjoy your writing so much!  

katielady said...

Um, are you DRIVING in this reduced visual state?  Please say no.

katielady said...

Oh, and sorry for the hospital visit, that is horrible.  Any indication why your body reacted like that?  Geez o pete.  (Had to throw that in there for good-ol Texan phrases that I know you miss.  I useda could say it all the time, and had a biggo time doing it!)

Pigs said...

Little bit? I'm a right-eyed driver.