Sunday, May 22, 2011

Bird Brain

I am shamed by the tragic lack of posting of late. It was a matter of surviving the end of the school year with its parties and prizes and money to send in and assignments....for me. A couple rounds of company and a lack of sleep didn't help the blogging out any either. Excuses, excuses, I know! OH FOR SHAME.

As I sit here blogging blissfully from the screened porch, I am reminded of why I am suffering a lack of sleep. Between the hours of 6am and 8am and the hours of 8pm and 10pm it is a veritable aviary out here. I don't know what these birds are talking about, or why they must do it right outside my bedroom window, but they are here to tell me about it. It sounds like some sort of extraordinary nature soundtrack. A cacophony of tweets, shrieks and jabbers echoing through the woods.

Here's what I suspect they're saying:

Squeaky Bird: Yo yo yo! What's up bird friends?!
Repetitive Bird: Not much! Not much! Not much! You?
Squeaky: Hey man, you see that fake owl she put up? What's UP!
Repetitive Bird: Almost crapped pants! Crapped pants! Scary bird!
Loudmouth Bird, definite New York accent: FAKE OWL! SO WAL MART!
Squeaky: Let's go bother the dog! First one to make him howl gets dibs on pooping on the lattice!
Repetitive Bird: What dog? What dog? What dog? Scary bird!
Loudmouth: Oh, IT'S ON.

Or something like that. They are impressed enough by my fake Wal-Mart owl to stay off the deck, but not impressed enough to shut their beaks. I suppose this is an improvement over the bird we had in Texas that flew into our bathroom window every morning at daybreak until his beak bled. That was a really irritating.

Have I really written this much about birds? Who cares about birds? Let's talk about me.

Preschool ended on Thursday until September 7th. [cue dramatic crying] The pool opened yesterday and we have already been twice. [cue dramatic homage to pool gods] These two pieces of information might be all that you hear from me for the next three (3) months.

Holy cow. I just sat here for ten minutes in a heart racing stupor thinking about how many days there are in three months. (92) Plus the seven in September and the 12 in May. That's 111. Eeesh. That's a lot of days. I'm going to refrain from counting hours. Let's think happy thoughts.

I need my usual "it's summertime and I need blog inspiration" inspiration. In the past I have kicked off summers with a photo request post. However, I've been told that my commenting system has been a gigantic fail lately, so the odds of that working are slim. If you feel so inclined, suggest for me something you would like to see a picture of. My world is narrow, so be creative. Please do not request to see a picture of my bird because there is only one way I'm going to shoot that guy.

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