Thursday, October 14, 2010

Please tell me the odds.

Yesterday, I had a bizarre experience at the doctor's office. You see, once preschool begins, I begin scheduling appointments willy nilly to attempt a health catch up of sorts. Dentist, OB, dermatologist, urologist (just now following up on those pesky kidney stones from 2008), and yesterday, a physical.

Since I had to fast for the blood draw, I made the appointment for 9:15, one of their earliest. Stomach churning, I arrived 5 minutes early. And then proceeded to wait in the waiting room, watching CNN pull miners out in Chile for a good 45 minutes. After being called into the exam room, I finished about 75 pages of a book, while shivering in my sexy exam gown, tied in back. All that was left for me to read was a Rachel Ray magazine. At this point, I could have cheerfully eaten my own arm I was so hungry, and I had additionally developed a pounding caffeine headache complicated by sinus pressure from not taking my allergy medicine. Did you know that Rachel Ray's magazine is pretty much entirely pretty pictures of food? Yep. True story.

It was in this state that I finally met the doctor and had the fastest physical of my life. I was then shuffled off to another waiting room to await my chest xray and blood draw. Still in my gown, I spot someone I know. OF COURSE I DID. It was a strange connection, though. It was my favorite cashier at Publix. Me being me, the crazy coupon chick, I was instantly recognized and we shared a friendly, awkward, be-gowned moment of greeting. We quickly launched into some hardcare coupon chat, sharing Publix strategy and whatnot when the story got weirder and more uncomfortable.

I'm not lying to you when I tell you that the manager from my Kroger was ushered into the same waiting area and sat down in her hospital gown. Guess who also recognized me? And spoke of coupon wizardry? It was the most bizarre.....awkward....we'll go back to bizarre again....experience. I suddenly felt some anxiety, as though my husband had just met my boyfriend. CNN continued to hum in the background as the pulled more miners out in Chile and suddenly, I felt a connection to that guy in the mine whose wife and girlfriend both showed up at the rescue site.

I introduced my Kroger manager to my Publix cashier and giggled nervously as I confessed that I was a dual shopper. A deal hog. A non-loyal customer. Oh, FOR SHAME. And to have my moment of comeuppance in a hospital gown tied loosely in the back? What are the odds?? Please tell me the odds. It's impossible. I must have dreamed it.

It's going to be one uncomfortable grocery transaction at Publix tomorrow. I'm not sure I'll be able to look Chloe in the eye.

6 comments:

Laura B. said...

Sounds like it should have been a Tuesday...

Christy M said...

Wow - what are the odds?  LOL - and in a doctor's gown, no less!

katielady said...

LOL that is SO, SO funny.  I'm sorry, this would only happen to you. 

Pigs said...

I can't make this stuff up!

Laura said...

I grew up in Florida and my mom always shopped at Publix.  Her favorite cashier was Ann and, when I was young, I was firmly convinced that this was Ann Landers. You know, people came through her line and she gave them advice while she rang up their groceries.

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