The Punishment Fits the Crime

Commenting fixed! Life is good. I finally switched out the blog and got everything tidy and neat. If you read through a feed reader, come check me out, 'cause I think I got a whole bunch prettier! *bats eyelashes* Actually, I was told once by a co-worker that I looked better in pictures than in real life, which I've always thought was one of the most clever back-handed compliments I've received.

Hey, abrupt subject change! Sometimes? Around 5 or 6 in the evening? When you've spent the whole day with little people? You just need adult conversation. Yesterday, I called a friend to chat while Piglet and Pigpen played in the yard under my watchful eye. My watchful eye was horrifically alarmed when it saw Piglet yank his pants down to his ankles and start peeing his patented pee. It wasn't Piglet dropping trou that was alarming because, sadly, he does that more regularly than I should admit. The alarm was triggered by Pigpen spotting the pretty yellow urine stream and galloping over to play in it like it was a children's fountain or something. Squealing with joy, he literally skipped to the pee and laughed as he splashed. HE SPLASHED IN HIS BROTHER'S URINE STREAM. I am still appalled nearly 24 hours later. I may never recover.

My kids seem to do things that are challenging to punish. I'm a fan of the punishment logically fitting the offense. Like, if you throw your frog at your brother, you lose your frog. If you throw food on the floor, you lose your right to finish the meal. If you punch mommy in the face, mommy...just kidding. But you get the point. But what's a good punishment for...refusing to wear clothes? Spiking your hair with water that you sucked out of your cup and spit into your hand? Putting dirt in your brother's ear "to see how much will fit"? These are just a few examples off the top of my head. I could come up with more if I had time to think about it.

And Pigpen is simply impossible to punish. At least I know what Piglet's buttons are and I have some privileges I can take away and others he can earn. Pigpen is a complete party animal all the time. When Piglet was his age, my problem was that he wouldn't stay in time out. Pigpen not only stays in time out, but he dances in time out, laughs in time out, and claps his hands while doing deep knee bends. He's totally going to be the frat guy who smashes beer cans on his head. At dinner, if he throws food, I take it away, but he doesn't care because he doesn't like anything anyway which is why he's throwing it in the first place. If I turn his chair around for a time out during a meal, he sneaks his head around to make faces at Piglet, or he lifts up his shirt and locates his bellybutton. "BELLYBUTT!" he yells, thrilled at his find. And if you haven't experienced it, it's impossible not to laugh when your 23 month old is yelling the word "bellybutt". Sigh.

Maybe I need a jail of sorts. A faux prison, if you will. Or Super Nanny. I wonder what she would say?