Pigs' Tales

Things happen to me, I write about them. Sometimes it's sweet, usually it's snarky. This blog is the true story of what happens when two adults and a bad beagle live in a house, have their lives transcribed, and add an active toddler and a newborn to the mix. Take the whole bunch and transplant them in Georgia. Think you can handle all that suspense and excitement? Join us on our adventures. Never teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Groan.

Lordy, Lordy....celebrities dropping like flies this week. Cah-razy! But I have something to share.

My child is insane. Certifiably nuts. Do you know what he did today during his quiet time? DO YOU? Let me just tell you a little story. It is, of course, about poop. What else would we talk about on my blog?

Piglet went upstairs for quiet time. Since being on summer break and going to the pool and such more often, Piglet has resumed nap-taking 2-4 times per week. Anyhoo...he was upstairs for a while playing quietly. I glanced at the monitor and noticed him missing. Looking into his room, I found him atop his (4 foot tall) bookcase crawling across on his knees. I took the garage which had been his stepstool.

Soon, I looked at the monitor and saw him standing upon two large pillow shams on top of his bed. Why? I asked. "I'm trying to reach the fan." Of course! Silly me. I removed the pillows.

About 30 minutes later, I went up to bring him downstairs and a stench hit my nose as I entered their hallway. It was clearly poop. I groaned inwardly, dreading the diaper change ahead. You can imagine my surprise when I entered the room to find my naked little boy, hands and feet covered in poop, as were the walls, carpet, bedspread, froggy, blanket, doorknob and phone jack. As in, poop in the phone jack. Piglet looked at me and said quite seriously, "Mommy, I think you're going to need a paper towel."

Ya think?