So I'm really enjoying staying home with Little Piglet, especially now that we are able to get out and about in the world a little every day. But, I have to say that I do miss teaching and I am as surprised as the next person. Well, I guess I'm not surprised that I miss the actual teaching, but I'm surprised to find that I actually miss things about my old [crazy] school. I suppose it's mostly my friends and the parents that I liked, obviously not the administration. I'm planning to go back in January and do some tutoring, so that should be just enough to curb this urge.
It made me feel better today when my friend who is teaching the wild group that I complained about all last year sent me this letter and cracked me up:
Dear Parent(s) or Guardian(s):
Please be aware of our new school policy for your 5th grader(s), effective immediately:
When you drop off your child in the morning, or when she/he arrives on school property, you have surrendered all rights to question, campaign for her/his well-being or otherwise interfere in anyway with your child's instruction.
Daily regimen will include effective and appropriate discipline, as deemed necessary, including but not limited to biological, chemical and nuclear weapons testing (safety gloves and goggles will be provided as our supply allows).
Should your child die during the day, every effort will be made to contact you to retrieve the body. Should this fail, the body will be made available on the South driveway between 3:30 and 4:30 p.m. We cannot be responsible for bodies left after 4:30. Teachers are often involved in tutoring, meetings, training or other required school activities well beyond that time and cannot be responsible for unresponsive students. A detailed report of the student's demise will be mailed to you along with a $10 off coupon for the Funeral Home. This report will be considered "final."
Should you have any questions, you have probably not read this notice thoroughly. It contains everything you need to know and you are advised to read it again.
Thank you,
The Fifth Grade Faculty
Boy, do I know how they feel. That letter says it all and brought it all back.
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