Dear Insane School District,

I would like to thank you for several years of writing material. Without you, my blog would have lacked proper color and angst. Without you, the blogosphere would have never gotten to experience the ludicrous decisions, outlandish behaviors, or disrespectful mouths of which I have spoken. And let's not forget about the students! They, too, have provided a contrasting mix of amusement and pity.

It is with little regret that I announce my resignation. I know that you may believe that I am leaving to tend to the wee Piglet come October, but I feel that you should be aware that this is not entirely the case. While this is a convenient time to bow out of the education game, it is with great conviction that I share with you my list of grievances:

1. Administration.
It seems that your hiring practices are a little less than ethical or practical for an elementary school. I personally believe that the principal of a school should be qualified for the position. Call me crazy, but I've observed that schools run more effectively that way. I have also noted that micro-managing a school often leads to a focus on "getting" people and the ignoring of our purpose in a school: to teach kids.

2. Parent Accountability.
Perhaps this is also related to my above grievance, but I feel that a district should set and enforce standards to which they require parents to adhere. The extent to which parents are catered to based on their standing in society is deplorable in this school district. This grievance extends to the issues of cell phones, suspensions, exceptions to rules, and dress codes. Elaboration may be obtained in my subsequent volumes.

3. Student Apathy
Student apathy is a problem everywhere. It is aggressively perpetuated by this district. Focusing solely on one test, and failing to recognize any students' accomplishments, gains or growth is contributing to this national problem. I cannot work for a district which exacerbates this widespread crisis. Knowing students only by their pass or fail status is not something with which I care to be affiliated, nor is only recognizing a test score or a campus status which is based on a test score.

4. Politics Over Education
Who you know and how much money you can give should have no bearing on a school, teacher, or student. The fact that you're a teacher in a school should have no bearing on your child's privileges. Understanding that if you teach children the curriculum in a fun and caring environment, the test scores will naturally follow should be an acceptable means of teaching. Caring solely about your campus rating is not education; it is training a group of robots to bubble answers on a test. The students resulting from this practice will not emerge with the ability to think creatively, problem solve, work with others, or love learning. See student apathy above.

In closing, thank you again for the opportunity to witness such a deranged environment. It has provided me with great amusement, anger, and bewilderment. I am pleased that you found my work and test scores to be satisfactory enough to rank such an impressive performance appraisal. I only wish that my evaluator had any idea why they were assigning me that coveted status. The vague comments copied from the state appraisal manual were unrelated to my style of teaching, but I could see where it might be challenging to write authentic comments about a teacher's classroom that you have only entered twice in three years. After all, that classroom is a really far walk from the office, as was mentioned to me several times.

Thank you for the opportunity for me to develop new coping skills. It was certainly an interesting experience. For further clarification of my above points, please join me in a more detailed elaboration of each in the coming days.

Sincerely,
Mrs. Pigs