Shudder

So....I had this dream last night. I was teaching a writing lesson about using figurative language in one's writing when I was abruptly stricken with a gut-wrenching pain in my pinky finger. My pinky! It really ruined my dream lesson, which was going remarkably well. In my dream I tried every possible remedy to lessen the pain. I ran it under water, I got an ice pack, even a Band-Aid. Nothing. It was pure unadulterated agony.
As I was walking up to the nurse's office in my dream, I finally began to wake up...to an intense pain in my pinky. Groggy and confused, it took me a while to comprehend what was going on. I felt around my pinky and realized that my long fingernail was bent completely backwards! Oh the excruiating pain! A shiver just went down my spine as I'm writing about it. I grabbed it and pushed it back into the correct position, holding it with firm pressure as I dozed back to sleep. During my morning session with the snooze button, I reached to pull my covers up and HEAVENLY HORRORS it happened again! What a way to wake up! I squealed like a pig and darted to the sink to nurse my wounded finger. A closer look revealed that it was bent halfway down the pink part ("the quick," my mother calls it) and bleeding profusely.
The purpose of this post is not to disgust you. My question is: What are the odds? Why do I never receive a normal injury? Not that I'm asking for injury, but good grief! How on earth does that happen? Upon closer examination, I also found a purple bruise on the knuckle of the same finger. I have always been an active sleeper, but gracious. I need a straitjacket.