Me: Um....I need to file an auto claim.
Agent: Can you describe for me what happened exactly?
Me: Okay, but listen. Before you judge me, I'm about nine months pregnant.
Agent: Ma'am, that's really irrelevant unless you sustained injury.
Me: Oh. Well, just so you know something bad happens to your brain when you're pregnant. I have a very clean driving record.
Agent: Tell me what happened, please.
Me: I kind of backed into another car. With....my car.
Me: Um, in my driveway.
Agent: So, you backed into a car that was parked in your driveway. Did you know the car was there? Who did it belong to?