"Gus! Just kidding, Gus! Come back!" I cajoled across the house. This dog has serious emotional issues with baths. He's very anti-cleanliness in general, but particularly regarding baths. The house rang with silence. The little stinker was serious about not having a bath today. I sighed and rose from my scrubbing to go find my emotionally wounded beagle. Walking from room to room, I found no evidence of an anxious beagle stressing over the prospect of getting clean. I looked behind chairs, under pillows, no Gus. And then I spotted his nose sticking ever-so-slightly from beneath my bed. He was on guard. And very serious.
This was not a joking situation. I talked sweetly to him, explaining the concept of a little joke. (Words wasted on a beagle, all he knows is that he distinctly heard me say "bath" while I was in the room of the bathing. Enough said.) There was no convincing Gus to come out, so I just left him there and finished cleaning up the bathroom.
Ten minutes later, there was still no sign of Gus, so I checked on his again, tried some more gentle coaxing. Nope. Not coming out. Right now? He's still there:
Poor Gus. So emotionally abused.